Family set to celebrate ninth birthday of Joseph Rourke and reflect on his brother’s lifesaving act

A boy from Redgrave is set to celebrate his ninth birthday tomorrow – five years on from his brother giving him a life-saving bone marrow transplant.

Joseph Rourke was three years old when he was diagnosed with lymphoblastic lymphoma for a second time in 2018.

The news was a crushing blow to parents Sean and Louise, who had already seen their little boy treated for the rare form of cancer.

He would go on to beat the disease for a second time – thanks to a successful bone barrow transplant from his older brother, Patrick.

Now in remission, Joseph is fit and healthy – and a reminder that amazing things can happen.

“We look at him and call him our little marvel,” said Sean. “He inspires us to not be down about the past and hung up about it, which is an important thing to take from it all.”

When he was first diagnosed with cancer, the youngster went through two years of treatment and was given the all clear in August 2017, before the family learned that the cancer had returned just five months later during a routine check-up.

This time, Joseph underwent 13 weeks of aggressive chemotherapy, followed by eight doses of total body radiotherapy, three doses of targeted radiotherapy and a further five doses of chemotherapy, with the latter wiping his body clear of all his own bone marrow to make way for the transplant from his brother.

The family were given the news they longed to hear, when doctors confirmed the operation had been a success.

They have celebrated the day he was given his new immune system, and new lease of life, ever since.

“Each anniversary, we celebrate that we are further away from those times,” said Sean. “We have a birthday party for his immune system, essentially.

“It is strange because five years is a bit of an arbitrary period of time. When you talk to the doctors, they consider you off the books, so it is a definite point for us all to take a breath and relax a little.

“We try to acknowledge that period of time has gone by and move on, but the constant underlying fear as parents is obviously always there.”

Both boys are doing well at school, with Joseph going to St Botolphs Primary School in Botesdale and Patrick, who is now 11, going to Hartismere School in Eye.

“Lou and I are both in awe of Joseph with all that he went through, and Patrick for what he did – he never once wavered, he never once looked like he would change his mind or falter,” said Sean. “He simply said he wanted to help his brother.”

Joseph still has to have annual check-ups at Addenbrooke’s Hospital, six monthly checks at West Suffolk Hospital in Bury St Edmunds as well as echocardiograms on his heart every couple of years due to the treatment he had.

Asked how it felt to be able to say it is Joseph’s ninth birthday coming up, he added: “There are lots of emotions as there were dark times when we thought this would never happen.

“We also feel guilt for those parents who we know who can’t say it.

“With every step of Joe’s progress we are blessed by him and there was something very poetic about Patrick being his donor.

“We have a picture with the boys sitting together in the hospital and I can’t look at that picture without being sucked back to that moment. I feel so proud of both of them.

“That was a life-affirming moment; one where there was a one-in-four chance that Patrick would be a match for Joseph.

“When he knew he was, he stepped up to help his little brother – he had no doubts in his mind at all: Joe needed it, Joe got it and Joe knows that and will never forget it.”

Along the way, the family were also helped by so many people, through donations, helping hands and by hospital staff, something Sean says his family will never forget.

He said: “There are so many people who have done fantastic things for us, from big gestures to small ones, and we could not have got through this without them all.

“Our family, on both sides, were always there and a circle of comfort for us, as we are for them.

“But there were also people who we got to know that immediately stepped up and gave without being asked.

“One of those notable groups were the King of the Cup guys (an annual fundraiser in Diss), who are now our friends. If we see them, they always ask how Joseph is doing; guys from all walks of life where Joseph has become part of their lives. It is just amazing.

“And last, but by no means least, those in the hospitals that were with us every step of the way.

“Even now, going into the paediatric day unit, nurses come up, chat and honestly remember us – they absolutely care. They should be paid like millionaires and are proper angels in our book.”

For his birthday, Sean said Joseph was looking forward to a sleepover with his friends tonight and a family takeaway evening tomorrow.

Asked what Joseph is like, Sean said: “Being the youngest, he has that cheeky demeanour about him, but he just enjoys life.

“He fell out with Patrick the other day on our trampoline, as siblings do, and Patrick said before going off ‘if he gets ill again, I am not helping out this time’.

“On the whole, though, they both deal with it in a pragmatic, mostly sweet way and understand what has happened.”